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Another Year Around The Sun

by Gerbera

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1.
January 03:48
It's mid January and the post holiday blues are in full swing. I wish I was a bear so I could hibernate til spring. The barren trees swaying in the wind waving at me feel like old friends. The sun is setting on another day and then it all starts again. Deja vu is setting in. The same old feelings coming back again. The seasons come and go so quick. Will it ever come to an end? The snow is falling to the ground as I watch from the window sill. I wish I was a bird so I could fly south. The bushes bow down to me like I'm some kind of royalty. When will I feel alive again and back to normalcy? I guess we'll see.
2.
February 01:28
Little things running through my head. Only questions with no answers. Visions of a life with no connection. Every year grows more lonely than the next. Is this all there is for me? Shroud myself in misery. Giving more and receiving less. Onward to my place of rest. no one to share my current thoughts with. Everyone seems to be paired off but me.
3.
March 03:42
I know time marches on. But I wish it moved a little slower. I'm not sure how I feel. I'm not ready to be any older. Another year around the sun. Another year without a love. I'll just eat a piece of cake. The only reason to celebrate. So many people reaching out. I really shouldn't be so down. Really nice to feel so loved. Shouldn't care about getting any older.
4.
April 03:10
Spring is here once again. Time for rebirth and new growth. Looking forward no looking back. Trying to be positive and composed. The weather changes day to day. Do I need a coat or a pair of shorts? I never know what to expect. But it keeps me on my toes. :Layers of pollen adorn my car making it a blueish green. I pray for rain every day, wash away these allergies. April showers bring May flowers. And that's all well and good. What I really love the most is the energy that reblooms.
5.
May 02:37
On grey days I feel so blue. I try to snap out of it but it's no use. Just when I think it's all a wash. You make me laugh and it's all been squashed. We don't see each other all to often. But when we do it's always a blast. Whether at a show or at a diner. I know our friendship will last forever. You're always around when I'm feeling down. Creating a smiles from a frown. I don't think you realize how much you mean to me. But I'm really glad you're around.
6.
June 03:18
The sun is shining not a cloud in the sky. The cool breeze blowing my hair in my eyes. Blue green ocean waves crash into the sand. Under the umbrella because I don't tan. And the tide rolls in and the tide rolls out. Smiles and laughter all around. Pizza, ice cream, and lemonade. Summertime is finally here! Three cheers! Seagulls trying to steal my lunch again. Fly away when they know they cant. The sand is hot and the sun is strong. A few more hours and Ill be gone.
7.
July 02:02
Can't seem to get off the couch these days. No motivation. It's a daily struggle between body and mind. Self preservation. I wish this heaviness would lift so I can get on with my life. But on the inside I'm empty. I want to scream.
8.
August 03:08
Summer heat wave that's lasted weeks. No end in sight. Thunderstorms predicted every day, but they just dissipate. Searing Sun rises in the East Immediate temperature increase. I look to the evening for some relief. But there is no release. The A.C. struggles to cool this place. I lay on the couch and melt. Just dreaming on icicles and Snow Angels. Anything to escape this Hell.
9.
September 02:46
I see your favorite toy in the basket and I think of you. I hear the birds chirping outside and I think of you. I lay my head down on my pillow and I think of you. I see a sun puddle on the ground and I think of you. And it's been a year and it hasn't gotten any easier. A piece of my heart is missing where you used to dwell. Ill never find your toys in the water bowl again, But Ill always have fond memories of you. Cardboard boxes on the floor and I think of you. Cat dancer hanging off the shelf and I think of you. Running water out of the tap and I think of you. Almost everything makes me think of you.
10.
October 04:06
Walking through the cornfield trying to find my way to you. With nothing but the light of the moon. I swear I heard you just up ahead. But it must have been the wind. Cobwebs glisten in the fresh nightly dew. As I continue to search for you. Wondering if Ill find my way out of here. And if Ill find you before I do? Goosebumps begin to appear. the smell of sulfur in the air. Is that you lurking just out of sight? Or is it something else waiting to prey on my fright?
11.
November 03:08
Orange, reds, yellows, and browns Blurred in the air as the leaves fall down the sun is shining through the clouds as I start my journey south. Smoke from fireplaces lingers high above. Traffic ebbs and flows as I try to stay calm. Cant wait to be in familiar company. It's our yearly celebration of gluttony. The sound of laughter emanates from inside the home where my family resides. Everyone's so eager to eat. Feels like we haven't eaten in weeks. The chips and dip just wont cut it anymore. Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and turnips. Cranbury sauce from a can. It's the best! Don't judge me, man! Apple, Pumpkin, and Chocolate Cream pies. This meal is complete and it's time to say goodbye.
12.
December 04:11
It's looking pretty green outside. And the temperature hasn't taken that deep dive. I don't know about you, but I'm getting nervous Please let this warm front pass us by. I'm longing for a snowy Christmas. A blanket of white as far as I can see. I don't want rain or any lousy sleet. Hey Mother Nature, please grant this one wish for me. It's partly cloudy which gives me hope. But I'm pretty sure its just rain in those clouds. It's really warm outside for this time of year. Hey Jack Frost, where are you hiding?

about

In December of 2021, I came up with the idea to write a song a month and record it within that same month. I wanted to challenge myself to see if I could actually do this and to learn and grow with my recording skills. I also wanted to try different things like using some of my pedals I hadn’t used yet, and incorporate other instruments, if possible. I also tried to write based on my moods, the seasons, any activities I participated in, remembrance of those not here anymore, friendship, Holidays, and even dreams I had. Basically, this is my 2022 dairy that I am happy to finally share with you all. It was a labor of love, and while not perfect, I think it turned out pretty good. Huge thank yous to Christina Kyle for creating the album art which I am so in love with. You captured my true likeness in cat form! And also to Darren Golda for mastering these songs and making them sound a million times better than I could have imagined. Also, Mark Hughson for being my cheerleader and encouraging me to keep going along the way when I was having second thoughts. And finally, thanks to anyone that gives this a listen. I truly had a blast doing this and can’t wait to continue learning and growing through home recording. Hope you enjoy this!

credits

released May 13, 2023

Erin Hays - guitar/bass/drum samples/various pedals and instruments/vocals

Recorded by me @ Hazer Dome 2.0 from January 2022 through December 2022

Mixed by me @ Hazer Dome 2.0 from January 2023 through May 2023

Mastering - Darren Golda

Album Artwork - Christina Kyle

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Gerbera Old Bridge Township, New Jersey

Just a woman, her instruments, and a computer.

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